Dog Jokes

The Dog and the Cat A dog and a cat are sitting on the couch watching TV. The cat turns to the dog and says, “Why do humans always call…

The Lost Dog Poster A man sees a poster for a lost dog that reads: "LOST DOG: Answers to the name Max. Missing since Tuesday. Loves chasing squirrels and digging…

The Dog’s Wish A man finds a magical genie lamp while walking his dog. The genie appears and says, “I’ll grant you one wish, but it’s a shared wish with…

The Job Interview A dog walks into a job interview. The manager looks at him and says, “You’re a dog. What could you possibly do here?” The dog barks confidently,…

The Dog’s Stand-Up Comedy A dog decides to try his paw at stand-up comedy. He walks onto the stage, grabs the mic, and says: “Ruff crowd tonight, huh?” The audience…

The Dog’s Retirement An old, retired seeing-eye dog is sitting on the porch with his human. The man says, “You’ve been the best companion I could ever ask for. What’s…

The Dog’s Diary vs. The Cat’s Diary A dog writes in his diary: “Day 1: My owner fed me. I’m the happiest dog in the world. Day 2: My owner…

The Secret Agent Dog A man adopts a stray dog from a shelter. After a few weeks, he notices the dog is too smart. It opens doors, answers commands before…

The Dog at the Bakery A dog walks into a bakery, sniffs around, and points to a tray of donuts. The baker, amused, says, “Sorry, buddy, we don’t serve dogs.”…