Fish Jokes

The Octopus and the Piano An octopus walks into a piano shop and says, “I need a piano with extra keys.” The shopkeeper asks, “Why? A regular piano has 88…

The Shark's Midlife Crisis A shark swims up to a group of turtles and says, “I’m having a midlife crisis. I’ve been eating fish my whole life, and I’m tired…

The Clownfish's Comedy Act A clownfish tries stand-up comedy and says to the crowd, “Why don’t oysters donate to charity?” Silence fills the reef. The clownfish pauses for dramatic effect…

The Fish and the Smartphone A fish finds a smartphone at the bottom of the ocean and starts scrolling through social media. Another fish asks, “What are you doing?” The…

The Whale's Talent Show A whale enters a sea talent show. The host asks, “What’s your talent?” The whale says, “I can hold my breath for over an hour.” The…

The School Dropout A little fish comes home from school and says to its mom, "I failed math today." The mom looks at the fish and asks, "What do you…

The Lazy Lobster A lobster and a clownfish are roommates in the reef. The clownfish says, "Hey, lobster, it’s your turn to clean the reef today." The lobster groans and…

The Fish and the Elevator Two fish are in an aquarium, watching people walk by. One fish says, "Do you ever wonder what it’s like to live on land?" The…

The Mermaid's Dating Life Why don’t fish ever date mermaids? One fish explained to another: “Mermaids are half-human, and humans only care about looks. Last time I dated a mermaid,…

The Smart Fish A man walks into a pet store and buys a talking fish. Excited, he takes it home and puts it in a bowl. The man says, "Say…